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Twitter Hilariously Reacts to ‘Killer Asteroid’ Reports: ‘Celebrate Valentine’s Day Like It Might Be Your Last’

John Wright February 13, 2020 Leave a Comment

Asteroid
From “Large Asteroid Impact Simulation,” via the Discovery Channel on YouTube

According to NASA, a “potentially hazardous asteroid” will pass relatively close to the Earth on Saturday.

If it were to strike our planet (it won’t), the asteroid would trigger a nuclear winter and mass extinction event, according to the International Business Times.

“According to the data collected by NASA, the approaching asteroid is larger than the tallest man-made structure in the world,” IBT reported. “NASA’s Center for Near-Earth Object Studies (CNEOS) has identified the incoming asteroid as 163373 (2002 PZ39). As indicated in CNEOS’ database, this asteroid is currently traveling toward Earth at a speed of almost 34,000 miles per hour.

“[The] near-Earth intersection will happen on Feb. 15 at 6:05 a.m. EST. During this time, the asteroid will pass over the planet from a distance of 0.03860 astronomical units or around 3.6 million miles away.”

While many criticized articles about the asteroid as “clickbait,” others found an opportunity for dark humor.

1. There are a lot of potentially hazardous asteroids

2. This “incredible speed” is typical for asteroids (~15 m/sec rel to Earth)

3. It will MISS Earth by over 13x the distance to the Moon.

Do better, @IGN https://t.co/LehZ1LQI04

— Jason Major (@JPMajor) February 13, 2020

If there’s an asteroid hitting earth then I’m going to need it to wait until the 1st.

I’ve got two weeks of rent to live out of this apt and I would like to not waste money.

— Moderna Thee Stallion (@CoreyPTownsend) February 13, 2020

The asteroid is now polling at 15 percent in the Democratic primary https://t.co/s7JjRAu2bf

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) February 13, 2020

No wonder people have trouble trusting the media. Clickbait is out of control. This article freaks people out until then end: "Asteroid 2020 CH will miss earth by 2.76 million miles. In other words, the asteroid will safely fly by nearly 12 times as far as the Moon is from Earth pic.twitter.com/1Pu6Rbhxam

— Ed Piotrowski (@EdPiotrowski) February 12, 2020

They started WW3, then they unleashed the coronavirus on everyone and now A FUCKING ASTEROID. These guys are going all out to stop Liverpool winning the League. https://t.co/CGoD6fNHNX

— Ahmed 🇵🇸 (@ahmedIfc) February 13, 2020

You're more likely to die from an asteroid strike than win the Powerball jackpot.

— UberFacts (@UberFacts) February 13, 2020

NASA has confirmed Asteroid is hurtling towards Earth at an incredible speed. (RT) for a chance to stay in my bunker with me! pic.twitter.com/r6fjH2qHoB

— KEEM 🍿 (@KEEMSTAR) February 13, 2020

I’m ready for the asteroid https://t.co/RA6VZ4WCfr

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) February 13, 2020

Alternate headline: average-sized asteroid will miss Earth by about 15 lunar distances

— Jason Major (@JPMajor) February 13, 2020

Nasa: Uh… Umm… Huston, we have a problem.
Bruce Willis: Got it! Consider the job done.👍
Asteroid: Oopsie 😱 pic.twitter.com/6SMmqHmL6u

— chaitannya (@chaitannya) February 13, 2020

Who in their right fucking mind would give a solitary fuck about this? Please giant asteroid finish us off, we’re all shit. pic.twitter.com/YyefuZUEGh

— Luce Cannon. (@crapolatombola) February 12, 2020

Celebrate Valentine’s Day like it might be your last…

“… the "potentially hazardous" asteroid could come close to intersecting with our planet's path on February 15, 2020, at 6:05 a.m. (EST).” https://t.co/ML1ZadAkN0

— kim (@4_the_babies) February 13, 2020

guys, you still have to deal with valentine's day. in fact, you really need to use this to your advantage.

go out with an epic bang.https://t.co/WxK62UO0sx

— Bonnie Blue (@BonnieBlueTK) February 13, 2020

Dear asteroid,

Mar-a-Lago can be found at 26.6771° N, 80.0370° W

With love,
Humanity https://t.co/ffB5VaHXaT

— Jonathan D. Lovitz (@jdlovitz) February 13, 2020

now taking your reservations for End-Of-The-World-Asteroid sex

— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) February 13, 2020

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